What is Matrescence .... and how can therapy help?

For a long time, motherhood was seen as a role that women simply stepped into. Even now, it is often viewed in society as something instinctual that appears as soon as a baby is born. Sometimes the shift into motherhood can feel like this. But more often than not, this underestimates the reality of what it means to become a mother/birthing parent. For many women/birthing people, becoming a mum is a profound transition that affects every part of their life.

What is matrescence?

Until the 1970s there was no widely used language for the psychological shift that comes with becoming a mum. Anthropologist Dana Raphael called this transformation Matrescence - to describe the process of becoming a mother. In the same way that adolescence describes the transition from childhood to adulthood, matrescence describes the significant transition that occurs when someone becomes a parent.

By introducing the term matrescence, motherhood was not just seen as an instinct that appeared at birth. Instead, it could be seen as a process and a journey. Having this language became hugely beneficial in helping people to understand the transformational shift that takes place when you become a mum / birthing parent.

Matrescence refers to the physical, emotional, psychological, and social transition that takes place. It describes the changes in the brain and body, shifts in identity, changes in friendships and relationships, new family dynamics and shifts in the sense of self. It is not limited to the postnatal period, but covers the entire journey of motherhood... it can even be different for each child that is born. In many ways, it describes the role that we grow into over many months and years.

What happens in matrescence?

The matrescence journey is unique for everyone. However, many women talk about similar experiences in therapy, such as:

• Changes in friendships and social life

• Changes in family dynamics

• Relationship struggles

• Shifts in sense of identity

• Body image

• Mixed emotions/hormonal fluctuations

• Birth experiences

• brain fog / exhaustion / irritability

• "Mum guilt"

• Social anxiety

• postnatal depression / postnatal anxiety

How can therapy help?

Matrescence is a huge life transformation and many women benefit from additional support during this time. A lot of the support given in the post-natal period focusses on the baby, and while this is important, I believe that it is equally important to focus on the wellbeing of the mother. Understanding matrescence can help mums navigate what they are experiencing and to know that they are not alone.

Therapy provides a space where you can explore the psychological, emotional and relationship shifts that come with matrescence. It can help to normalise experiences such as low mood, anxiety and feelings of "mum guilt". It provides a space where you can:

• Work through any relationship struggles or shifts in family dynamics

• Talk though any difficulties regarding body image or self-esteem

• Process difficult experiences and feelings

• Reflect upon the ways in which you were parented

• Learn about yourself and understand your own patterns of behaviour

• Begin to grow in confidence

  
  

Why matrescence matters

Although the word matrescence has existed for decades, it has received greater recognition in recent years, as we begin to focus on understanding and supporting the mental and emotional wellbeing of mothers and birthing people.

I feel that greater awareness of matrescence is crucial in providing reassurance and realistic expectations for new mothers about what motherhood looks like. Becoming a parent is a profound life transition, and it deserves compassion, understanding and support.

Support

I regularly support women navigating their matrescence journey. If you would like to ask any questions, you are welcome to book a free 15-minute call.

You can read more about counselling for mums/birthing parents here- https://www.hattienichols.com/counselling-for-mums

I also work for a charity called Release Therapy for Women based in Brighton and help to facilitate counsellor - led therapeutic groups to support women on their matrescence journeys - https://www.releaseforwomen.org.uk/for-mums/mother-nurture/